More Than Miles

Sitting with a friend and listening well is often the most helpful thing we can do.

Theme: More Than Miles
Verse: "Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ." (Galatians 6:2)

My good fictional friend Ted Lasso recently returned for a fourth season. One of the things I appreciate most about the show is how it explores nearly every aspect of life -- relationships, winning and losing, changing jobs, and dealing with uncertainty -- all through the lens of a Premier League soccer club.

For a time, the show followed Ted as he experienced panic attacks while navigating the end of his marriage, coaching a sport he did not fully understand, and adjusting to life in a foreign country. I was glad to see him seek help from a qualified therapist and begin working through what he was experiencing.

Accessing professional counseling, however, is not always easy. In those situations, our connections with the people around us become especially important. That is certainly true in communities whose members run or exercise together.

Exercise can improve mood, reduce stress, and support mental well-being, but it is not always enough. We cannot always see what another person is carrying, and feeling better after a run does not necessarily mean the underlying struggle has disappeared. That is why it is important to be aware of changes in ourselves and to pay attention to those around us.

Some signs worth noticing include:

Persistent sadness, tearfulness, emptiness, or hopelessness

Irritability or angry outbursts over small matters

Loss of interest in usual activities

Significant changes in sleep

Low energy or difficulty completing ordinary tasks

Noticeable changes in appetite or weight

Difficulty concentrating or making decisions

Any one of these signs may have many different causes. But when several persist or begin interfering with daily life, it may be time to seek help from a qualified mental-health professional.

In 1 Kings 19, Elijah went through a very difficult time. He fled from Beersheba, went into the wilderness, and prayed that God would take his life: "I have had enough, Lord. Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors" (1 Kings 19:4).

God's response is remarkable. He met Elijah's immediate physical needs. An angel brought him food, water, and rest. Then, through a gentle whisper, God ministered to Elijah in his despair and reminded him that he was not alone.

In Elijah's story, we see a pattern that can guide how we care for others today:

Meet physical needs. Since most of us are not mental-health professionals, practical care may be one of the most immediate ways we can help. Prioritize sleep, nourishment, and rest while also recognizing the importance of emotional and spiritual support.

Provide companionship. Be present for one another. Sometimes the greatest gift we can offer is simply letting someone know they are not alone.

Encourage healthy perspective. Qualified mental-health professionals are often best equipped to help people reframe unhealthy thinking, and the first two may help make it possible for our loved ones to reach the point of seeking that help.

We are unlikely to be the treatment another person needs. We may, however, be the person who notices a troubling pattern, listens without judgment, and encourages them to seek appropriate support.

The best way to begin is often to listen more than we speak. As the saying goes, God gave us two ears and one mouth, and we should use them in that proportion.

Stay aware. Listen well. Carry one another's burdens. Help people connect with the support they need.