Choose your words wisely.
Theme: Sticks and Stones
Verse: "The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit." — Proverbs 18:21
In an episode of MAS*H, B.J. complains that Hawkeye never lets anyone have the "last word." Hawkeye agrees to let B.J. have the final say. Feeling victorious, B.J. declares, "THANK YOU!" Hawkeye pauses, then delivers his own punchline: "YOU'RE WELCOME."
Have you ever been in an environment where verbal banter is rampant and choosing not to participate can be seen as a sign of weakness? The military, especially an Air Force flying squadron where Type A personalities are practically an entry requirement, is famous for this kind of interaction.
It's easy to dish out jokes at someone else's expense, and a little good-natured ribbing can be OK. In fact, it can sometimes be instructive if the person on the receiving end learns something from the experience. However, we can take the jokes a bit too far, and what starts as harmless banter can quickly escalate into anger, damaged relationships, and even more serious confrontations.
We often fall back on the familiar saying, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me."
This saying is intended to help young people develop resilience when faced with verbal attacks. The underlying message is a good one: Other people's words do not determine our value. But let's be honest. As we often say at work, "It briefs well." But does it really hold up in practice?
Let's look at this from the other side of the conversation—not as the recipient, but as the one delivering the words.
Words carry tremendous weight, especially when they come from someone in a position of authority. We may intend a comment to be harmless, but our intentions don't always determine its impact. What we find funny may be discouraging, embarrassing, or hurtful to someone else. A few careless words can damage trust and relationships long after the laughter has ended.
As followers of Jesus, we should use our voices to lift others up, not tear them down. The rest of the world is already doing a pretty good job of the latter.
Ephesians 4:29 offers us some important guidance:
"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen."
Paul challenges us to think beyond ourselves and consider how our words affect others. That includes our humor and the way we treat people when we're joking around. Our words should do more than get a laugh; they should contribute something worthwhile to the people who hear them.
The next time you have an opportunity to engage with someone, take a moment to consider the words you're about to use. Will they empower, elevate, or encourage that person or group? Or will they tear someone down just to get a laugh or win an exchange?
There's nothing wrong with having a little fun with others. When used well, humor can build camaraderie and strengthen relationships. But we need to recognize when good-natured banter crosses the line and someone becomes the target rather than a participant in the joke.
Having the last word may win the exchange, but it doesn't necessarily win the relationship.
Choose your words wisely. You never know how much they may matter to the person hearing them.
Have a GREAT week!