"We Are Family” | Rev. Vicki Harrison

At New Hope This Sunday

It was the Sunday before school started back, and you could feel it in the room. Rev. Vicki Harrison opened with a grin — "Kids, who's excited about going back to school tomorrow? Teachers, are you ready?" — and the church stood to worship with "I'm So Glad He Changed Me," "New Name Written Down in Glory," and "I Am Who I Am."

There was a lot to celebrate. The night before had been RISE, our first-ever Next Gen conference, and Vicki couldn't stop smiling about it: "The Spirit was in the room. It was life-changing. It was great to be together as brothers and sisters from different congregations — just being one body of Christ." It was also Promotion Sunday — Miss Katrina and Miss Karen sent our kids up a grade, gaining new faces in the classrooms and handing a few of the older ones over to PSM ("which we don't really want to do," Katrina joked).

Then Vicki did something we don't usually do on a Sunday morning: she gathered the whole church for a family photo — but more on that in a minute.

We Are Family

How does Jesus define family?

Vicki started with a picture of her own family — a portrait taken in April in front of Logan Hall, at her oldest son Daniel's wedding. Her husband Richard "in his shades," her three grown kids, a new daughter-in-love, her parents, her in-laws. "That's my family, and they are dear to me," she said. "And then I have another family. And that is all of you."

Which is why, before the kids were dismissed, she had the whole church squeeze to the middle for a group photo — our first in fifteen years. "You're an important part of our family," she told the kids. It was a little chaotic, a lot of fun, and exactly the point.

Jesus Turns Family Upside Down

The text was Matthew 12:46–50. Jesus is teaching in a home when word comes that his mother and brothers are outside wanting to speak with him. In that honor-and-shame culture, family loyalty was everything — so his answer would have landed like a shock: "Who is my mother? Who are my brothers?" Pointing to his disciples, he says, "Here are my mother and my brothers. For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother."

Vicki was careful here. This doesn't mean Jesus turned his back on his family — even from the cross, he made sure his mother was cared for. "He wasn't putting his family down. He was elevating the importance of spiritual family." And then the line that anchored the whole morning: "The church is not like a family. The church is a family." Not an analogy. A reality.

A Household of Households

So which comes first — your family or your church family? Vicki's answer: that was never the right question. Scripture holds two truths at once. Your biological family is a treasure and a gift from God — "anyone who does not provide for their own household has denied the faith" (1 Timothy 5:8). And the church is the household of faith, where we discover our true identity as God's children.

She put a picture to it. We often imagine our household on one side and the church on the other, separate. But the more biblical picture is an umbrella: the church family is the covering, and our households — whatever they look like (and Vicki was clear that biblical families rarely fit the tidy "mom, dad, 2.5 kids and a dog" mold — think Ruth and Naomi, or Mary, Martha, and Lazarus) — all live underneath it, led by Jesus. Not competing. Intricately linked.

Her example was closer to home than she probably wanted to admit. When her son Sam decided he wanted to play hockey, she did her research and found the only league in reach played its games — of course — Sunday mornings. "That's not even a question," she said. "Our household belongs to the greater household of New Hope, and we prioritize those relationships." Plenty of activities don't land on Sunday morning. This one did, so it was out.

Look Around — These Are Your Siblings

"If you've said yes to Jesus," Vicki said, "you're a child of God, and you have a lot of siblings." She asked the room to look around at the people in the pews. Some you know well. Some you barely know. Some you like. Some, maybe, you don't. "It doesn't matter — because we're family, and we're going to spend eternity together. So we might not always like each other, but we'd better learn to love each other. Because that's what family does" (Ephesians 2:19).

The Mask Comes Off

What did that look like in the early church? Acts 2 says they devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching, to fellowship, to breaking bread, and to prayer. Vicki imagined those first gatherings in people's homes — intergenerational, kids running around, grandmothers bouncing babies, everyone knowing everyone's name, everyone's joys and tragedies. "There wasn't any hiding. You did life together. And there were probably some people who got on their nerves — let's be real — but they tolerated it, because they were family."

That's the invitation, and it costs us something: "To do this well, we have to really get to know one another. Not superficial relationships. That means the mask comes off." We're coming out of a season of Christianity that prized the pretty mask, she said, and moving toward the genuine, sincere relationships where people actually grow. "It takes work. It's actually kind of hard work. But it's worth it." (She proved her point on the spot, sending a self-described room full of introverts out of their seats to introduce themselves to someone new. They did great.)

Four Things Families Do

If we take our cue from the early church, family life together comes down to four habits:

1. We pray together — not just "thank you for this food," but deep, honest, heartfelt prayer.

2. We study the Bible together — on your own is good; in community, you get stretched and challenged and see things you'd miss alone. New small groups start this fall on Wednesday nights at Recharge.

3. We break bread together — the early church was always eating together and receiving communion together. Vicki's challenge: linger after the service and invite someone you don't know well to lunch or dinner this week.

4. We mentor one another — discipleship, formal or casual. "Family shows others what it looks like to live in the faith. If there's someone whose walk you admire, go ask them. You don't need us to arrange it. Go do it."

All of it in service of the family business — our mission at New Hope Church: know Jesus, grow faith, go multiply.

Praying Over Our Teachers

Because school started the next morning, Vicki closed the way a family would. She invited every teacher, administrator, and school-support worker to the altar, and asked the rest of the church to come lay hands on them. Pastor Roberto opened the prayer, asking God to make them light in the darkness — "use them to shine your light wherever they go" — and Vicki closed it, praying that the word family at New Hope "won't just be a word. It will mean something deep. Lord, we belong to you first, but we also belong to one another."

Then the church lingered, shared communion served by Pastor Levetta, and got to know one another — because that's what family does.

Questions to Sit With

• Why do you think Jesus' words in Matthew 12 would have shocked his family and his culture?

• Where do you feel the pull between your household and your church family — and what would it look like for them to work together instead of compete?

• Of the four family habits — pray, study, break bread, mentor — which one is God nudging you toward? Who's one person you could invite in this week?

Rev. Vicki Harrison preaches at New Hope Church in Brandon, Florida. Watch this message at findnewhope.com/message-archive.

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Other Sermons from Pastor Vicki